In officially less than one month, I will have a TWO year old. As much as I would like to say I'm excited, I'm actually kinda sad. Like an almost nauseous feeling. I don't have a *baby* anymore, per say. I have a little girl, who runs and talks and dresses herself (with help of course) and is so independent. She doesn't need me the way a baby does. And that? Makes me sad :(
Don't get me wrong, I have thoroughly enjoyed watching my girl grow into her own little person and it IS lots of fun. I have had the best two years of my life because of her. But with each passing day, I think about how one day she may be embarrased by me in front of her friends, or how she will meet a boy and won't have time for her mommy. I realize I did the same thing to my mom, it's the circle of life, yada yada yada, but this is MY kid. I'M the mommy. It *should* be different. I want to be her bestie forever. My heart physically aches thinking of these times. I just have to soak up every drop from every day of her life and go to bed knowing that I have shown her tremendous love.
Don't get me wrong, I have thoroughly enjoyed watching my girl grow into her own little person and it IS lots of fun. I have had the best two years of my life because of her. But with each passing day, I think about how one day she may be embarrased by me in front of her friends, or how she will meet a boy and won't have time for her mommy. I realize I did the same thing to my mom, it's the circle of life, yada yada yada, but this is MY kid. I'M the mommy. It *should* be different. I want to be her bestie forever. My heart physically aches thinking of these times. I just have to soak up every drop from every day of her life and go to bed knowing that I have shown her tremendous love.
I promise you this, being a mommy is the HARDEST job I have ever done. Before you have your own kids, other moms tell you that. But honestly, before you have kids you can not even fathom the amount of love that dwells inside of you for another person. Heck, even now, I still can't believe that my heart is capable of loving someone SO STINKING much! This is something that can NOT be explained, it has to be felt in order to understand. You just want so much for you kids and to some degree it's out of your control. You can do the very best you can, but they are their own person. All I can do is pray, pray and pray some more that she becomes an amazing woman for God. I try to be an example, but I am human and make mistakes. I just hope she grows up and realizes just HOW much I love her, but mostly how much Jesus loves her.
I'll step down from my soap box now....
Mia at 23 months old you...
*Still wear a size 4 diaper, but they are getting pretty small. I'm hoping to get you potty trained before the next size ;)
*Speaking of potty training, you love to sit on the potty and wipe and say YAY while clapping your hands, even though you didn't *use* the potty!
*I die of cuteness every time I give you something and you say "Thank you" (tint you-as it sounds)! Learning your manners!
*You have full blown melt downs now. Most of the time not even phased by spanking OR timeout. You are extremely strong willed and hard headed. Hmm...wonder where you got that from?! Cough cough ::pointing finger to POPPY:: cough cough! HAHA!
*You don't like sitting in a high chair or shopping cart. You can always manage to get out, even when buckled in. My little Hudini!
*You still sleep about the same: bed anywhere between 8-9 and up around 8-9 in the morning. You get the sleeping thing honest. Mommy and daddy love some sleep!
*I love to watch you play. You are so smart. You can build a tower of about 5 cubes. Probably more but you get so anxious to knock them down you don't continue!
*We have a few books you love to read OVER AND OVER. You can point out baby Jesus (chesus), the kitty cat (meow), the horse (EEEE hehehe), grapes (gapes), banana (said perfectly :)), and much more!
*When asked you can say and point out your eyes, nose, mouth (mouf), toes, ears and belly. You just amaze me!
*Physically: you weigh 26.5 lbs are are about 31 inches. You now wear a size 7, yes SEVEN shoe. One day you will grow into those feet my dear! HA!
You love fruit! You would eat it until you turned into one! When we go to the grocery you ask for blueberries, strawberries, bananas and grapes!
Little lady ♥
One of your many funny faces!
YAY bathtime! Everytime I go into your bathroom, you chase me down, follow me in there and say "bath? bath?" and get mad when I tell you not until later!
Just want you to know...
Take a look at the mountain
Stretching a mile high
Take a look at the ocean
Far as your eye can see
And think of Me
Take a look at the desert
Do you feel like a grain of sand?
I am with you wherever
Where you go is where I am
And I'm always thinking of you
Take a look around you
I'm spelling it out one by one
I love you MORE than the sun
And the stars that I taught how to
shine
You are mine and you shine for Me too
I love you yesterday and today
And tomorrow I'll say it again and
again
I love you more
Just a face in the city
Just a tear on a crowded street
But you are one in a million
And you belong to Me
And I want you to know
That I'm not letting go
Even when you come undone
I love you more, I love you more
You shine for me
And I see you and I made you
And I love you more than you can
imagine
More than you can fathom
I love you more than the sun
And you shine for Me
(Song: More by Matthew West)
Mia Camille, THAT is how much Jesus loves you. That is how much I love you. You are my gift from Him and I could never show enough appreciation to Him for you. All I can do is love you with all of my heart and show you THE way. I pray fervently for you to know and love Him. You are going to go far my beautiful little lady!
I love you!
Forever and ever,
Mommy
